Brad, laid off due to
COVID. Massage therapists
are high risk they say.
Brad decides this is
a good time to TV binge.
Never saw Dexter.
He devours all 8
seasons, inciting his foul
childhood dysfunction.
He decides to take
trauma to the streets, becomes
serial killer.
But he needs a niche.
Walking down the sidewalk, he
passes hot dog stand.
The stench of processed
pig in skin casings makes his
vegan stomach churn.
*Light bulb* His niche will
be butchers! He starts stalking
neighborhood meat store.
Brad has foot problems.
Plantar fasciitis and
sweaty, smelly feet.
These prove to be small
obstacles in his stalking.
There’s a solution!
It’s nothing that his
black orthopedic shoes and
sweat socks can’t handle.
Now he needs weapon
of choice. A butcher cleaver
of course! *Evil laugh*
_____________________________________________________________________
Francois got kicked out
of fashion design school for
pilfering fabric.
He can’t help himself
around herringbone pattern!
But he doesn’t fret.
He was recently
met with lush inheritance
from Grandpa Morgan.
He no longer HAS
to work but needs something to
supplement habits.
He has designer
taste on a healthy, yet not
abundant, budget.
To honor his late
grandfather, of the butcher
trade, he gets same job.
At the neighborhood
meat market. Sporting
Christian Louboutin.
Red bottoms and a
Gucci smock. He slays outfit
(and the daily meats).
Walking home from work
one day, he notices an
atrocious eye sore.
A creeper wearing
black orthopedic shoes and
80s knee-high socks.
*Gasp* Brad knowing that
he is exposed, seizes the
moment and grabs knife.
Francois has a well-
trained butchers’ eye and can see
cleaver blade is dull.
He doesn’t want to
harm his Gucci smock, but risk
is low with dull blade.
Scuffle ensues and
Francois pulls double duty
as he disarms Brad.
While also trying
to de-footwear him. But wait,
the struggle weakens!
Brad pulls back when he
notices Francois’ trendy
red bottom loafers.
They exchange fashion
advice and Brad is firmly
swayed on new hobby.
Francois’ personal
stylist (aka shopping
bitch). It’s a win-win!
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